My dear friends,
Some of you were unable to attend my speech at Columbia University yesterday, so i have taken the liberty of hacking YC’s blogger account to reprint a transcript of the highlights my act, er, no, my speech! Yes, my speech, i mean, my speech. Enjoy, retards! Er, I meanm enjoy, my friends! Yes, that’s right, I mean, friends.
“Even though I was deeply hurt at being asked to speak at Columbia University only after it turned out that Osama Bin Laden had a conflicting engagement, and even though I was for reasons unbeknownst to me, excluded, nay, banned from visiting what you people call ground zero, or as I like to call it, A Good Start, I still will try to make my fans on the Upper West Side feel as if they got what they paid for.
Cough, americans, cough, retards, cough cough.
Allergies. So, where was I? Ah, yes, here is a, what you say, joke, to get things started on a light note: What do you call a homo in Iran? You don’t! Because we don’t have any! Not even one!!! Bad dum dum.
Which reminds me, what’s the deal with that thing you people refer to as the holocaust? It’s not like there’s any proof that the Nazi’s slaughtered six million Jews, not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Until someone can show me some proof, why not call it the “hypotheticaust”? Theory, people! Not fact! Am i right? Am i right or what, retards? I mean, people. Er, yes, people, my friends, my delightful american friends who believe in freedom of speech, cough, retards, cough, on the Upper Jew Side of Manhattan! Sheee-ite!!! Did i say that? Oh no I di-int!!”
Thank you, thank you very much.