My pony

I need my brown-red pony, I need to jump on my horse. I need it bad. I do. I am so damn uncomfortable. I am cranky. I am creaky. I am crackly, and not in a good way. I want my ibuprofin. I even emailed my doctor to tell him, “I have no bruises, and my bloodwork was good, so pretty please, can I just have a taste?”

Why oh why does the one pill that makes me feel GOOD have to be the one pill I am forbidden to take at this point?


I woke up in a cold sweat last night. I dreamt that I ate and I ate and I ate, and I kind of wanted to make myself throw up to alleviate the pressure, to take away some of the fear of fat, but I didn’t want to take a drive down Bulimia Road. I woke up feeling a strange and anxious mixture of full and hungry. I wasn’t sure if I had dreamt any of it, or if I had actually woken up in the middle of the night and eaten a box of Hostess Creme-Filled Cupcakes, a plate of Duncan Heinz double fudge brownies, a bunch of heart-shaped soft-baked chocolate chip cookies (I kid you not) and washed it down with a quart of Hawaiin Punch. And that was just the beginning.

In the dream, while all of this was going on, there was a background of terrorism – a bombing in an office which left my mother-in-law missing and presumed dead (impossible, since my mother-in-law doesn’t actually work in an office, or work at all, for that matter) and extreme sports – my family was participating in some sort of weird body-skiing program, whereby we “skiied” down the mountain using our bodies rather than skies. I, of course, was too busy eating to participate, although I did stop to watch the whole thing.

Where do these thoughts come from?!

I need my brown-red pony. I need to climb on and take a ride to Comfortville.



3 Responses to My pony

  1. samasthiti says:

    Could you take a valerian? Helps me with aches when I am feeling guilty about taking advil. Supposedly no side effects.

  2. Debpc says:

    What about arnica? I use that after long runs or other hard workouts and it really helps. And I have backup. Dean Karnazas (a.k.a Ultramarathon Man– 50 marathons in 50 states in 50 days) recently endorsed Boiron brand Arnica as his “secret weapon,” saying it works like advil but more subtly. I’m not quite sure what that means but it’s worth a try.

  3. yoga chickie says:

    I should get some topical arnica. Not too keen on valerian or ingestible arnica for the simple reason that there is no research on what they do to your body if you’re having surgery.

    I had a sucky sucky practice today. I am in hell – or rather, limbo, I guess. I can’t wait to get to the other side.

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